Tag: Courage to Change

Sharpen Your Saw Before Getting To Work

Sharpen Your Saw Before Getting To Work

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Courage To Change — November 12, 2019

When I had hit the absolute career bottom in my mid-20’s, I was broke, and pleading with Employment Insurance (government support program we have here in BC) for a path out of this mess. They enrolled me into a study and life skills program, and it was structured around Stephen Covey book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” It’s a good book. Relevant to the reading today is that there is a chapter titled “Sharpen the saw”.

Literal translation, take care of the tools you use to get the work done. In our case, it’s a little more esoteric. We have the tools, but now we need to maintain them in order to keep us working at our best. So yeah, maybe it’s time to sharpen your saw

Quick and Simple Disclaimer: The readings in this post are literally taken wholesale out of the book entitled Courage to Change. You can find it at Amazon, Here. The portion entitled Alleged Insight, well that mess is all me.

If you’re an introvert, go buy the book, if you’re a broke introvert, the text from many good books can be found HERE , if you’re in dire straits however, go find an Al-Anon Meeting, it saved me.

So onward to Today’s Reading

I’m not particularly handy with tools.  Recently a friend demonstrated to me that oiling a saw before using it make sit work more smoothly, whether it’s cutting metal or wood.

Later it occurred to me that learning to oil a saw is a little like learning to apply the Al-Anon program.  Though skeptical, I considered learning a new way because I saw it demonstrated. I knew that the program worked when I saw how serenely Al-Anon members in circumstances similar to mine were coping with difficult situations.  So I tried their approach – I learned to apply the Steps, Al-Anon literature, slogans, meetings and sponsorship.

Using this oil doesn’t change the raw materials of my life, nor does it provide me with new equipment.  It does make what I already have more useful, and that removes many of my frustrations, giving me great satisfaction.

Today’s reminder

Building a  useful and fulfilling life is not an easy task. Al-Anon helps me learn more effective ways of living so that I can avoid needless difficulty. With proper tools, progress is just a matter of practice.

Quote:

“You learn to speak by speaking, to study by studying, to run by running, to work by working; and just so you learn to love God and man by loving.  Begin as a mere apprentice and the very power of love will lead you on to become a master of the art.“

   Francis de Sales

Alleged Insight:

When you get up in the morning, the first few minutes are often on autopilot and it’s challenging to adapt to anything new. That is exactly the time when having the right tools to hand means the difference between responses and reactions.

In short, while the big projects of our recovery are the materials from which we rebuild ourselves into the people we choose to be, our acceptance, self-awareness, placing unmanageable tasks in our Higher Power’s care, there is a whole aspect that’s neglected.

Our toolbox is what helps us get from here to there; sponsors, slogans, prayer, meditation, self-care; all lead to the end results of becoming the better version of yourself. Taking care to maintain these tools in their best shape only makes senses when you think about it. Oil the steel and sharpen your saw before you get to work.

May God bless you, and DFTBA.

Sincerely, Duke.

Forgiveness is the Key to Your Serenity

Forgiveness is the Key to Your Serenity

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Courage To Change — October 15, 2019

Our lives are often tangled messes. Webs of resentment, regret, shame and discontent are so tangled and extensive that finding a string to start unraveling the whole often means getting strangled by the rest of the strings that still hold us fast. Forgiveness is the key to understanding the big picture; which threads to pull to loosen the whole knot. Forgiveness is not about proving anything, or about actual redemption, but about letting go. It’s for you, the forgiver, not for the forgiven. Forgiveness is the key to freedom, your freedom, of spirit, mind and body.

Quick and Simple Disclaimer: The readings in this post are literally taken wholesale out of the book entitled Courage to Change. You can find it at Amazon, Here. The portion entitled Alleged Insight, well that mess is all me.

If you’re an introvert, go buy the book, if you’re a broke introvert, the text from many good books can be found HERE , if you’re in dire straits however, go find an Al-Anon Meeting, it saved me.

Credit: Pixabay

 

Today’s Reading

The most loving form of detachment I have found has been forgiveness. Instead of thinking of it as an eraser to wipe another’s slate clean or a gavel that I pound to pronounce someone “Not Guilty,” I think of forgiveness as scissors. I use it to cut the strings of resentment that bind me to a problem or a past hurt. By releasing resentment, I set myself free.

When I am consumed with negativity over another person’s behavior, I have lost my focus. I needn’t tolerate what I consider unacceptable, but wallowing in negativity will not alter the situation. If there is action to take, I am free to take it. Where I am powerless to change the situation, I will turn it over to my Higher Power. By truly letting go, I detach and forgive.

When my thoughts are full of bitterness, fear, self-pity, and dreams of revenge, there is little room for love or for the quiet voice of guidance within me. I am willing to love myself enough to admit that resentments hold me back, and then I can let them go.

Today’s reminder

Every time I try to tighten the noose of resentment around someone’s neck, I am really only choking myself. Today I will practice forgiveness instead.

“A part of me wants to cling to old resentments, but I know that the more I forgive, the better my life works.

. . . In All Our Affairs

Alleged Insight:

I am so very guilty of this. Focusing on other’s behavior and actions rather than on my own self and soul. The poor me, pity train is a hard one to derail. When you wake up in the morning, you’ve a full day ahead of you, a gift from God, which is why it’s often referred to as the Present. Live life to the fullest, enjoying your Present. Holding on to the past is like trying to pull on the water that’s gone beneath the bridge. The past has passed, and it’s gone. The only things left from the past are those things that we learn, remember and cling to.

While there’s no harm in memories, focusing on them, obsessing over them is literally pointless. You’re sacrificing today’s joy for yesterday’s pain. To be truly free to live your life and be the best possible version of yourself, focus on the good from the past and make notes of your own shortcomings so you can maybe learn and grow.

Others may change because of your feelings on things; it’s possible, if they are so inclined; but the reality is that most people are who they are. Without a major external influence, most people are just going to go on being themselves, regardless of how you feel about things. Thus holding onto your feelings about other peoples actions is kinda like drinking the poison so the other guy will die.

Closing thoughts:

The point of life is to do good, to serve others and our sense of well being (true happiness) is not found in acquiring or possessing, but in serving and supporting. True freedom comes from letting the past lay where it fell, learning the lessons it imparts, and growing from the experience. Once you’re past something, it’s power over you is solely determined by your choice to let it affect you.

Remember:

At the end of the day

In every way,

You can choose to be

For all to see,

Gracious and Awesome