Remember to Focus on the Positive Things

Remember to Focus on the Positive Things

Courage To Change — March 29, 2019

I’ve had a bad few days. In fact, it’s been a couple of weeks at this point. All I could see was the pain, deadlines, stress. I could not see past how hard done by I was. I have five amazing kids and they’ve seen the worst possible version of my these last few weeks. I’ve become the monster I tried to tame. I forgot to remember to focus on the positive things in my life. Aside from a moment here or there when one or the other of them was particularly cute or adorable, I have been bound and down, living in a self-made hell of my own design.

Quick and Simple Disclaimer: The readings in this post are literally taken wholesale out of the book entitled Courage to Change. You can find it at Amazon, Here. The portion entitled Alleged Insight, well that mess is all me.

If you’re an introvert, go buy the book, if you’re a broke introvert, the text from many good books can be found HERE, if you’re in dire straits however, go find an Al-Anon Meeting, it saved me.

So onward to Today’s Reading

It’s time I started being nicer to myself. The voices in my head that tell me I’m not good enough do not speak the truth; they merely reflect the damaged self-esteem that results from living with alcoholism. When I recognize that fact, I can tell them to be quiet! I will no longer listen!

Al-Anon recovery has given me gentler, loving thoughts. These remind me that I am lovable and can learn to love myself. When I open y mind enough to hear that message, I can begin to hear all other wonderful sounds of life, and the abusive thoughts vanish.

Today’s reminder

Treating myself with kindness and respect helps me to challenge my own self-criticsm. Today I will pay particular attention to any voice that speaks lovingly.

“We need to learn to live, to focus on something good or useful to our lives and let the rest of the world go about it business.”

From- How Can I Help My Children

Alleged Insight:

This too shall pass. Or so I tell myself, so very often. I have been looking at the pain, the stress and the deadlines…

This morning, while trying to get the file finished for my client (who needs it at like 9 am), my baby girl wakes up. I had to consciously let go of that need to complete the work and really look at the baby. She looked at me, vulnerable, and wanted morning snuggles. As a dad, I had no real recourse but to sit and snuggle and gurgle with the baby. It was a good moment.

The stress from the deadlines is still there, the pressures never abate until the work is done, but how does one step aside from that train of thought and focus on the positive things? What are the positive things?

The sun came up.

I got more than 2 hours of sleep.

The coffee is fresh.

I have a moment to journal this.

I got nothing else. What do you expect, I’m only two days into this reset.

Pray for me will ya? Thanks.


Closing thoughts:

What you focus on, expands. And this too shall pass. When all I can think about is how I’ve been wronged, where my dis-satisfaction is rooted, then I seem to sink deeper and deeper into the hole. When I actively start to focus on the positive aspects of life, then maybe, just maybe, I can step out of the hole I’ve dug and see the horizon and the beauty of life.

P.S. We need to start talking about this crap, or our kids will have to fight our demons. I don’t know about you, but I sure as hell don’t want to leave my demons for my children. Duke.

External Links:


Alcoholics Anonymous

Recovery Readings

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