My Attitude Changes Everything

Courage To Change — April 2, 2019

I heard it said somewhere, that your life is 10% what happens and 90% what you do about it. If you start with a crappy attitude, then everything turns out no so great, but if you begin with the end in mind, and tackle life with a positive attitude, or in our cases a compassionate one, then life is amazing. Literally, your attitude changes everything.

Quick and Simple Disclaimer: The readings in this post are literally taken wholesale out of the book entitled Courage to Change. You can find it at Amazon, Here. The portion entitled Alleged Insight, well that mess is all me.
If you’re an introvert, go buy the book, if you’re a broke introvert, the text from many good books can be found HERE , if you’re in dire straits however, go find an Al-Anon Meeting, it saved me.

So onward to Today’s Reading

I have heard that the time to be especially gentle with myself is not when I’ doing well, but when I am doing poorly. I may be able to push myself hard when things are going my way, but I invite trouble if I try this when I’m already struggling to manage the basic activities of y life. I used to worry that if I didn’t push myself all the time, I would turn into a slug and nothing would get done. But my Fourth Step Inventory showed me that the opposite is true. I tend to be very hard on myself, so hard at times that I make my own life unmanageable. As a result I often accomplish less than I would if I took a more gentle approach. For me, the best antidote is the slogan, “Easy does it.”

When I notice I that I’m having trouble with my day, I try to slow down. And instead of automatically assuming that I am wrong, I try to consider the possibility that I might be right on schedule.

Today’s reminder

“Easy Does It” suggests not only that I learn to slow down, but also that I learn to lighten up. Today I will strive to take a more accepting attitude toward myself and to enjoy the day, regardless of what I achieve.

“Improving or own attitudes and our own state of mind takes time. Haste and impatience can only defeat our purposes.”

From: This is Al-Anon

Alleged Insight:

Attitude is everything. For example, right now I’m feeling upset and have a very stressed negative attitude, but the kids just got home, they’re not fighting, dinner is sorted (not cooked, but I know what has to happen and when), and the sun is shining. Hell, if I was less of a painfully shy introvert who believes everybody is making fun of him, I’d go pull up a chair by the neighbor and talk to her about inconsequential things because I’m feeling desperately alone right now as well (no adults around to talk to, only ever the kids or people calling about work).

This morning I started out with a good attitude, but something shifted when I tried a few times to reach out and open up, but life was too busy (yes, busy is a real problem in our world), at that point I started to have this very pessimistic attitude. I basically just went downhill from there, lonely, frustrated, etc. etc. Some good time out in the sun with a shovel, and accomplishing some small things around the house (the mountain of laundry is addressed, dinner is planned, that kind of thing), these things helped, but the pressure from the work I can’t seem to get to and get done is an issue.

I have to keep rebooting my positive attitude, but that’s what we do. Fall down, sure, but keep getting back up. If I were to let the attitude I came into the fight with dictate the outcome, I’d just stay down.

Closing thoughts:

Attitude is everything, again. I can’t say this enough. I really can’t. Ever tried to explain this to a preteen as they’re coming into their own full-blown emotions, trying to work through where they need to go and who they need to be? It’s frightening really, the level of incapacity that they’re dealing with at that age, and the power of the life they’re experiencing. It’s like giving a toddler a loaded gun. No wonder Romeo and Juliet both died.

Live as an example, live and teach by example, so that maybe my kids don’t end up trying to fix their own broken paradigm in their forties.

Duke.